Past, Present and Future

This is for You... Encouraging u to go ahead n try it out with him. Like wat u said... Give Love A Chance.

Giving Love A Chance, Taking a risk.
U never know if it's disaster or bliss.

Pondering, wondering and procrastinating.
But dun keep him forever waiting.

Hindered by past,
But as u said.... it's a past.

We grow from every failed relationship,
Helping us to be a better partner.

Like a baby who learns to walk and falls,
She cried but she stood up n tries again.

Ur previous one may have failed.
You cried but stand up and try again.

Be bold n Be brave.
He may be someone tat u craved.... :D

Cheers!

Getting There...

Last night was a night of booze n fun. Feeling down from a utter failure cos i din even have a chance to get to know her... no chance for her to know more abt me.... no chance for us to progress. She made her decision. She choose him... hence Head and i went for drinks at Detention Class... A pub under our office... Cheap drinks with free food....

3 of us... we had 5 jugs of beers n a bottle of johnnie walker... kkk... juz before u think tat we drank alot... we din finish the johnnie... perhaps still left with a quarter? or less... keke... was really drunk but a little high as i started to speak loudly... i always talk very loudly when i am a little high... tsk tsk

Woke up this morning damn lethargic... but managed to drag myself of my bed... did a overall calculations for this month... i should be there... getting there... appts lined up for the week... if nothing goes wrong... i will surpass my target by half... :)

The worse Monday i had in my entire life

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A day tat i shall remember. First sms of the day... my bro.... sigh... telling me to change my job and all the same old stories.... lecturing me for borrowing the car.... at 26... can't i choose my own career? can't i choose wat i wanna do? And can't i drive? damn! Does he know how well i am doing now? sigh....

Back to office... saw a mail.... from her.... i was happy as i have decided to limit my contact with her. No more morning chats while she on her way to work. No more sms from me in the morning or watsoever. But she took the initiative to mail me. I was happy.... she still thinks of me. :D

Well before u guyz say how bad can this monday be.... here comes the bombshell....

She told me she is accepting tat guy who is after her for 2 years soon... my heart is shattered... though i dun love her yet but somehow i feel an acute pain. As i tot we hit it off well n she began to play a more impt part in my life. A motivator, a driving force. Someone who took over Lishi. When i saw lishi n her bf's pic on the msn at this moment, there was no bid of jealousy. Anyway she feels tat i have not gotten over lishi. But the fact is i have already gotten over... itz been mths. Anyway if that's the decision she is goin to take.... all i can say is tat.... we met too late.

Burnt

What a way to start my weekend.... as mentioned earlier... she couldn't make it tonite... i was pondering if i should juz heck the car since i have to return it b4 6am the very morning... nonetheless, the temptation of having a car was too unirresistable for me. Furthermore i was hoping tat she might be able to meet up for a while. So SFX3509G here i come!!!

Back home.... BANG!!! shit... i scratched the rear of the car... damn the body kit... so bloody low... how to park!!! assessing damage... not too bad... might not have to repair.

Out i go!!! Met head n went to pick up Dao hong... Bang!!!! i tot the front is scratched now... damn damn damn!!! So upon reaching caeser's the first thing i did was to check the front... phew..... no damage...

On my way home after meeting a client.... Bang!!! front kanna again... went down to check... omg!!! really bad... no choice... went to OCBC n withdrew $200 for my bro-in-law. sigh... $200 poorer... no money liaoz.... :(

Don't Be So Enthu At Times

For whole of day, i was waiting for today. Cos today i will meet her for dinner n drinks. A meet up just to know her better n for her to know me better. However, to my greatest fear, she has to work overtime. I'm not sure if itz true but i choose to believe her. But somehow deep in my heart, i feel tat she is afraid of me. Perhaps i was too "on"? or too pushy? I dunno cos i felt tat she took it pretty well n tatz y i carried on... but i guess i overdid it....

I'm a little upset now... for i thought i found someone who will finally fill up the void but i guess i think too much. She was not meant to be for me. I think too much.....

New Beginning?

Pressure sets in and my stand starts to waiver. Did i make a wrong choice, a wrong move to stay or re-enter this industry? I pulled myself up and said ok... last month... make or break.

2 Weeks had passed. Results are there to be seen... obviously i wasn't pushing myself hard enough... if only i had... if only... ya... if only...

Met her thru a fren... added her into our conversation n i think we struck off well... got her number and began to chat... itz nice and i dunno y... less than 1 week or so... i kept thinking abt her. Am i desperate? or i have found the one? hmm...... well... we'll see... friday is our first date... we shall see.. i miss her :P